i am patiently waiting for my hair to grow longer.
honestly, i want to test how long it can grow before i get irritated and cut it off.
i used to want to cut my hair when it reaches the collar or shoulder.
i haven't had long hair in a LONG LONG time!

i've been thinking recently, that maybe i should be different.
not different from everyone else.
Different from what i've always been.
Its not like i'm going to force myself or anything, afterall, i AM growing up.
Like, its just mundane stuff that i want to change.
Really think twice before doing something or CHOOSING something.
I've regretted one too many times for choosing something wrongly.
And i am not going to torture myself for the after effect.
I know people say that we should learn from our mistakes,
But hell! I've made more than several mistakes. and i'm to blame.

i've been told in school that i should act like a girl
i think my masculine features is more obvious than my feminine features
but i think i'm really soft and fragile inside.
those close to me knows that. i just dont show it and why's that?
I'm always restricting myself from showing how i really feel.
And thats my ultimate weakness.
somehow i can't make myself to let out how i feel inside.
maybe its cos i care more about other people than i do for myself.
thats a big praise i give to myself but its my nature.
i care too much for people around me


Alright, i dont know whats up with those two paragraphs.
Suddenly i'm emo-ing. Joe's right!
i'm going to go do some tutorials now.
Ciao.



its kinda blurry.. mm, thats better.